Trying Hard.

"At least finish your tea." He said.
Then the pages wouldn't feel so bad.

Around us now the silence hung.
Contradicting the repartee so long.

"The perspective is a star." I said.
"On still waters it won't stray."

"Let us not talk. Hold on."
"Start from where we begun."

The glances held. The thoughts frayed.
"What were we talking about?"

Such a state we felt at last.
"Put it down, come on fast."

But the birds few away and the day.
Overwhelmed, so still we sat.

"The tea is cold." I said.
And continued to tear the pages apart.

The Light

That compelling fragrance wafts,
Tantalizing my senses again.
It pulls me into the reserve,
Where all my senses awaken.

I'am one with love today.
His beauty all around me I see.
For what yesterday I failed,
To acknowledge and embrace.


My eyes are awash with light,
And the brightness flows within,
I let the windows open,
For my soul to soar in the breeze.

In lightness my thoughts flutter.
With nostalgic, incandescent wings.
Submerge me and overwhelm me.
Gladly I will walk the way.

There I'd peace. There is noise.
An exquisite harmony blends.
I feel it reach out and fuse.
My soul with His inside out.

THE SHOW

 

Shocked to see your story told??
Your complacent existence put on hold??
But here is comfort in duplicity.
Someone else indulges in the complexity.
Giving a look of unreal sanity.
For just a penny, the pomp of faked reality.

Every un-shed drop of salty tear.
Crushing the heart with mortal fear.
Shall hide the vices of your pride,
That which in agony will pain your stride.
Now hear the music, it drowns;
As the vibrant paints hide the frowns.

Echoes of gay applause thunder.
Comedy in every well-enacted blunder.
But remember not your mistake.
In the dazzling amusement do partake.
For uneasy reflections keep tomorrow.
In our jubilant presentation lose your sorrow.

No defeated heroes played by actors,
Or everyday trials of the spectators.
In these scenes we shall our lives immerse,
And see those golden moments reverse.
Give back in these two hours of triviality,
No contending with life and loss of joviality.

If you happen to remember you may.
What you have forgotten along the way.
That life was yours to live,
Spent in uncertain appearance you must give.
Tomorrow even we must pack and go.
For to-nite come and watch the show.

SHE

She was so different.

So charming and suave

In all her manners, grown.

As a lady she was known

She had a sense of style

In every way one could see;

Full of sassy moves,

Always a joy, to behold.

She bounced to a dreamy tune.

In the noise and the crowd.

With her private angel, what-nots

She in whispers crooned.

It was all so mundane sometimes.

She pouted her lips.

Still not knowing what joy'

Within herself She foremost seeks.

A smile playing over her

undecided lips, She speaks.

A story of herself and love

In a life so complete, so fulfilled.

She had the gait,

of one who knows the paths.

Yet mischievously she treads.

Never a flight for her too far.

With confidence in her eyes,

Happy as can be when caught

For sure she is of wriggling free,

Beware she knows all tricks and treats.

That wonder in your gaze.

Shall never cease. For;

She loves so, you can see.

But easy for you, she will not let it be

In abundant new sweetness

She everyday wakes.

That innocent blush heralds the day.

On her own wild and free, on a new way.

not an everyday story

Not many times I would say

That I kept the drift of life aside

Turned around and looked inside.

To find the peices have shifted and twisted.

The jigsaw has quietly rearranged,

No more what it used to be.

It talks to me even then,

But this time I heard a diferent story.



A story of me.

Something so different about me.

Not out of the ordinary,

For changes to duck in-conspicuous,

And while I have always seen

The wider world change all around.

The crucial time is missed

When I could see myself do......



Now in a situation somehow;

So ideal for my shaky revelation,

The sensations under my skin,

Make the colour rise in a silent blush.

The kaledeiocope suddenly alters.

The world is looking at me!!!



It takes a little time now,

Finding the threads and walk ways;

That have parted so long ago,

But cannot shift no more.

In senses can no more drift.

An uncomfortable warmth sets in.



It is not over yet!

For what is not within me now.

I see in others just the same.

A little lost in myself.

More so in what role I'am playing tonight

Coz I find the storyline, of;

The evolution natural in me,

Enigmatic and without an insight.

I find consistent in-consistency...is it true or just Me???

It's not past 2 years and i am already... i mean literally looking back in time as in an hour-glass to a girl who was all studious n all.... books and elocutions and competitions..... for whom being Right was so right.Thats me... I mean.... that was me.... I knew the same people then n whatever new is right now must be additions to my data-base.... so why such a metamorphosis.Can't even say I'am bad right now.... I have succeeded in evading brand-names... it's confusing and disturbing knowing full for sure that what I'am today I won't be say a year from now.So what is that me..... the non-changing format that transcends time.Take even social life.... youth is for sure going cause I'am miracles of all...feeling frightfully responsible.... God save!!!.The same friendly bull-shit sucks right now..... cause I'am not able to make the banter nor do I want to.... and the friends... oh I love them all so much; are aware of differences somehow and are different too.Deal with this.... my boyfriend who's like Everlast steel in my life is now into the desi-husband factor.... I miss the boyfriend-wala feeling..... the charms of forbidden but thoroughly bitten by the social-sanctions bug too.I was a compulsive blogger in my short stint till August n then a period of nothing and here I'am back... it's a little tough when you look back I guess.... cause as much ahead you move you are different.... an evolved entity for better or for worse.Can't help it.... but if it's like I'am trying to find a pattern in the chaos then.... well it's tough n anyways whatever... I'am already looking ahead.

Reaching Somewhere Different !!!!!!

I saw till there was nothing more I cared to see.
I heard all in favour and against until it ceased.

Now!!My judjement may not be The One.Of course..
You are afterall someone else.Not another Me.

You said right is this that stands justified my Dear.
But how is there the bad also justified for me to see??!!

There were so many of "those" words to clarify.
Many handy examples to pass out,to explain those things.

I somehow remain un-convinced ,my Dear.I do.
But I dont want to modify anything.Just let it be.

There is Your life for You to live.As you see.
As I have Mine to live in a way I see most fit.

Somewhere the questioning and pondering over matters
The tired "how comes" and "what ifs" do finally stop!!

I am almost there now, hoping not to turn back.I mustn't.
Just living as Me and You have always done together.

Some things change, like the others don't Honey!!
You got to live with some just as you do without others.

Different person's dont think alike now...
Do they??Will they??
And I'am left in thoughts as to what to name...
The destination where I stand today.Is it..??
What they call "acceptance" or the word "compromise".